Hello — to both the new week and you.
I’m coming off a whirlwind weekend of celebrating a close friend’s birthday, having an early St. Paddy’s Day celebration with corned beef and cabbage, and working overtime to meet a deadline. My brain and body are definitely feeling tired today, and I’m thankful for the ability to take a bit of a breather.
However you spent your weekend, I hope you had bits of beauty abounding in it.
As we continue with this month’s theme of Practicing Presence, we’re focusing on what it looks like to:
Navigate Discomfort with Presence
“The only time you are actually growing is when you are uncomfortable.”
T. Harv Eker
“Find your edge.” The words were spoken as we settled into pigeon pose. It was a restorative yoga class, meaning we would stay in each pose for several minutes. “See if you can stay with it.”
It happened to be a lot of discomfort. I could feel the tight pull in my right hip, and usually by this point, I would have eased up. But there was something in this invitation that felt right. It felt important. I had found my personal edge of discomfort, and I didn’t like it one bit. I hate pain. I don’t enjoy being uncomfortable. But this, I knew, wasn’t about pushing myself in a way that risked injury (it didn’t). This invitation was about pushing my personal edge long enough to stretch the threshold of my discomfort.
What followed was a powerful moment of release in my hip. I have experienced many breakthroughs in my inner world through the years, but I don’t know that I’ve ever felt one so clearly in my body. I felt a physical softening and, with it, a raw emotional response. I stayed in pigeon pose and wept, releasing old stories that my body knew well—stories of holding, of locking down, and of self-protection. The body truly does keep the score.
Discomfort shows us areas where we can grow—in fact, growth only happens when we step outside our comfort zones. New situations don’t usually feel natural. There is much in life that isn’t comfortable. Do you know what’s really helpful in practicing new ways of doing things? A growth mindset. We’re all learning to navigate life as we go, and realizing that we don’t have to settle for the way things have always been is a necessary step toward meaningful change.
As we practice being present to discomfort, we get to choose what to do with it. This means that if we’re feeling like it’s too much in the moment, we can back off. If we feel like there’s something worth exploring in it, we can push into it a little more.
Perhaps discomfort is not the danger you think it is. Instead, it could be an invitation to find your edge. What if you simply stayed with it longer than you normally would? A minute or two? Let curiosity lead you in this. You get to listen to your body and make a choice at any point. Notice what comes up that you may have been avoiding. It may show you that the right thing is to back off, or you might be surprised by the breakthrough waiting for you as you choose to lean into it.
Truth be told, I didn’t know that I had been avoiding discomfort (at least in my body) until I was in that position in yoga class and was given a reason to stay with it.
Maybe you could use the same nudge I received. Listen to the pull of the moment—ease back when you sense that is what is needed, and lean in when you feel the curiosity and urgency in it. Every practice of presence is a lesson in connection to yourself.
What kinds of situations do you retreat from because you don’t want to be uncomfortable?
When you notice feelings of discomfort in your day, look a little closer. Is the discomfort actually an invitation for you to step outside what you’re used to? If so, consider engaging it and moving toward where the growth is.
Something to keep in mind: if this isn’t landing for you, you might be in a time when you require less outward growth and more inner healing. If that is the case, comfort is going to be important, and safe spaces are going to be the containers in which you need to spend as much time as you can. Please know that different seasons call for different approaches. Simply come back to this when it feels aligned (or don’t), and tend to the parts of you that need extra care in the moment you’re in.
Be gracious with yourself as you find your edge, my friend.
Sending love,
Sara
Oops, that posted too soon! I love that you stayed with your edge and had that beautifully healing release. I think I’ll go do some yoga! (Pigeon pose is my very favorite yoga pose.) I will be carrying your powerful words/story with me today. 💗
Sara, this is so thoughtful and helpful.