Monday Mindset
The importance of listening
Welcome to your Monday Mindset. At the start of this new week, I hope you’ll bring intention to how you approach the cracks in your schedule, turning a curious mind to the spaces you would normally rush to fill.
Continuing on our monthly theme of trust and how to build it, this week’s focus is:
The Importance of Listening
“I remind myself every morning: Nothing I say this day will teach me anything. So if I’m going to learn, I must do it by listening.”
— Larry King
There’s often a gap between what we (think we) know, and what is true. If we never take the intentional time to seek out other perspectives, or at the very least listen to them, we will operate more on narrow assumption than on the breadth of reality.
In order for trust to grow, we need to feel seen, heard, and supported. In order to feel heard, seen, and supported, we must create safe and supportive environments. Those who know they have a listening ear can speak from the heart; they don’t have to fight for attention.
When a whisper is heard and responded to, there is no need to shout. When we create practices of listening to our inner world, as well as to our bodies, we build containers of safety. This is where what needs to be heard is heard, what longs to be acknowledged is seen, and where we take ourselves seriously.
You see, listening is not just a space-holder for others; it’s also a gift of presence and awareness we can extend to ourselves. Our bodies hold so much wisdom. They will communicate with us if we take the time and space to quiet our distracted minds and pay attention.
As with any skill, listening is like a muscle we can strengthen over time with use.
If trust is the strong connection everything else flows from, listening is an active way to connect to the wisdom that is already present in our relationships. Taking time to pay attention to our bodies, hearts, and minds gives space and opportunity to check in with what is lying beneath the surface. This is how we learn more about our inner motivations, needs, and desires.
Listening provides us with a pathway to a clearer understanding of what needs are present, and in turn, how we can address them. Our bodies hold the wisdom; we just need to learn to tune in to what they are communicating.*
We have physical, emotional, and social needs. When we learn to connect with ourselves with intention and tune into the places that need tending, we can take action that helps rather than hurts.
Get to know your communication style—whether you need absolute quiet, focus, and space to be heard, or whether guiding questions are needed. This may look different at different times, but the skills of active listening apply. Try carving out some time to listen to yourself this week, and make a note of what comes up for you.
Take a moment right now to listen to the sounds around you, closing your eyes if it helps. What do you hear?
Do a body scan starting at the top of your head and slowly going down. Pay attention to the sensations in your body, taking note of them.
If you want to take it a step further, listen for thoughts, and tune into the feelings that are present. What do they tell you about what you might need today?
*You know your body best. You know the state of your heart, your mind, and your energy. And this isn’t meant to deter you from seeking outside help for medical issues and symptoms. Part of listening to your body—including your mental and emotional state— is knowing when you are out of your depth so that you can reach out for help. Please see this as an encouragement to deepen your self-trust by rewriting patterns of self-neglect with intentional self-connection. This is the work. And the details will look different for each of us.
I hope you’ll take the practice of listening into your week. Keep an open heart, and take good care!
Free subscribers, I’ll see you here next Monday. Paid subscribers, I’ll catch you on Wednesday with the Mid-Week Motivation.